When bad things happen to good dolls…

As I’ve mentioned before, I regularly peruse Ebay and Etsy to see what I can find for my dolls. Unfortunately on Ebay, it seems like anymore I have to weed through an awful lot of junk. Etsy isn’t quite as bad, but even there, once in a while, something completely bizarre turns up. One day I was looking and came across a listing that sparked an idea–wouldn’t this make a hilarious blog post? You know, kind of like those clips that Marv Albert used to show from different sports outtakes?

So, be sure that you’ve finished swallowing that last drink you took before you continue on. No seriously–these are really either hilarious or just completely…gross for some folks. Okay, done swallowing?

These posts fall into several categories: Scale issues, Gross and Just Plain Bizarre…

Innocently enough I’d started this particular morning with a search on Ebay for American Girl. I always search the “ending soonest” listings first and then check the “newly listed” ones. As I’m looking through them, this one listing just kind of stood out…

bad ebay harry potter

This is supposed to be a Harry Potter wand, but to me, it looks like she is holding a giant turd. Poopo Eructo spell anyone? (Nice try, but a swing and a miss!)

Believe me, it gets worse.

I was looking for a particular listing that I had shared with Sharry a while ago and in the process I came across this:

bad ebay etsy listing for potty chair pendant

Yeah, just what I want for a necklace, a 1/12 scale potty chair to wear around my neck. Uh, no. This one was on Etsy and usually I like what I find on Etsy. Most of the time.  Yes, someone took the time to attach a necklace bale to a doll potty.  Wow. Why don’t I just wear a toilet seat around my neck? This is just bizarre.

Sharry sent me this one. It’s not as bad as some of the ones I’ve seen, but it does have a bit of a creepy factor to it:
bad ebay doll with detached leg
I don’t have problems with selling a doll with a detached leg, it can be repaired. But that leg standing there with the cast on it is just weird. This auction included an extra outfit as well, just wondering if it came with a free exorcism too?  I always get a kick out of auction photos where the seller couldn’t be bothered to put the stuff in a location with nothing else in it.  Does the lamp behind it come with the auction?  My favorites are the ones where the room in the background looks like a tornado went through it.  Come on, I just want to see the item for sale, not your underwear in the laundry basket. (Seriously, I’ve seen that!)

A while back there was a listing on Ebay for a Sunshine Family doll that annoyed the heck out of me. Not only was it NOT the Sunshine Family mom or any other Sunshine Family doll for that matter, they had the world’s ugliest doll head on a Sunshine Family body and kept trying to pass it off as such.   They kept relisting it, over and over and over again.  I was hoping to find that one to share with you.  I couldn’t find it though.  Instead I found this:

bad ebay sunshine ichabod crane

“Yes, you too can have your very own, limited edition, Sunshine Family/Ichabod Crane/Sleepy Hollow version!” In all seriousness, they were just selling the Sunshine Family dolls for parts, but what in the world were they thinking with this horrible photograph. This is the kind of stuff that nightmares are made of!

Last, but certainly not least, is the one I said that I had sent to Sharry before. I did find it again, and I realized I hadn’t shown it to my husband. You should have heard him when I showed it to him:
bad ebay bitty baby poop

Yes, someone is trying to sell Bitty Twin sized doll poop. For $14. Yeah, you read that right. We were both like “oh dear”. But then we read the listing, and that’s when the laughter and comments got completely out of control. “This is for a set of 2 authentic doll poops.” WHAT?!?!?! You mean to say that these dolls actually do poop? Am I not feeding mine right because I am not finding any of this. My husband said that maybe you have to squeeze them really hard and it pops out? Is this what stuffing looks like after it ages? I thought only old people had an obsession with poop.  Honestly, I don’t remember the last time I laughed that hard.

You can’t make this stuff up.

Due to several requests, I would like to try and make this a regular feature on this blog. If anyone else comes across anything bizarre like this in an Ebay or Etsy listing, please send me a link to it via e-mail. Links only, no photos or otherwise because I want to check the listing out personally. No guarantee that I will use it, but you never know. My e-mail address can be found under the “about me” section. Please use the words “Bad Ebay” in the subject line so I’m sure to check it out!


24 thoughts on “When bad things happen to good dolls…

  1. Can I vote for this to be a recurring column on your blog? I really did “LOL”😃
    I, too, am always perplexed by the photos that are a complete disaster in the background.

    • When my husband and I were house looking, we saw a listing for a house, that I kid you not, had a picture of a bedroom with not just an unmade bed, but a pile of dirty laundry in the middle of it. I couldn’t help but think to myself “what were they thinking”, but then on further thought, made note of who the real estate agent was for future reference because he/she certainly fell short of doing their job too by allowing a photo like that. Some people!!!

    • I’ll just put this out there: If anyone else comes across anything bizarre like this in an Ebay or Etsy listing, please send me a link to it via e-mail. No guarantee that I will use it, but you never know. I’m only one person who only uses a small portion of my day to look at these websites! My e-mail address can be found under the “about me” section. I’m not publishing it here because of Spam-Bot software.

    • Yeah, that last one, I was kind of like “ewww” when I first saw it, but then upon reading the listing and seeing the price, it went from “ewww” to OMG!

    • Considering the listing for the doll poop has been out there for several months–I guess we are safe to say that NO ONE is buying it! LOL As I said to Evil Twin in our phone conversation today, it would be cheaper to go and buy a bag of Tootsie Rolls and use those instead!!! 🙂

  2. Oh. My. Goodness! Too Funny! Especially the last part about the doll poop. [laughing so hard tears in eyes]

    Oh, you know there are enough crazy things out there to make this a regular post even if it is just one item at a time. LOL Reminds me a bit of Jay Leno’s headlines Tonight Show feature.

  3. Loved this post, lol…I have often thought the same thing about the “tornado rooms” and the minimal to no effort in the photos sometimes. Maybe the Etsy person that made the potty seat necklace, should buy those poops and turn them into earrings. Then it might be a set worth purchasing, lol.

    • I’m definitely going to try, but it won’t be on any kind of schedule. You just never know when you are going to come across a “bad” listing!

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